Saturday 19 January 2013

Kingsley Iweka: Sex or marriage, which comes first?


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Sex is NOT a creation, it is an act. Sex is an act as much as corruption is an act, will you therefore say that God ‘made’ corruption?
I deem it especially necessary to make a few things clear as regards the content below, please pay particular attention and try not to assume that you have absolute understanding of my state of mind and/or inclination. I believe in God and I favour the concept of marriage, where a man clings to a woman and loves her like Christ loves the Church. I also stand for purity.
I have said this before, and I am saying it again; God does not make husbands or wives, God makes men and women. I fear that I might get too philosophical, may be even blasphemous if I delve as deep as I would love to about this matter. The concept of ‘marriage’ has in my opinion become over-rated. I would have said wedding, which is actually the typical reality that we mostly mistake for marriage.
We refer to sex too many times as a ‘creation’, for example when we say “God ‘made’ sex for marriage.” Permit me to indulge here a bit please- if God made sex for ‘marriage’, it therefore implies that God made marriage and that he made it for a particular reason(s), as the case may be, right? Sex is NOT a creation, it is an act. Sex is an act as much as corruption is an act, will you therefore say that God ‘made’ corruption?
Let us not be naïve, marriage even according to the Bible is not the ultimate (1st Corinthians 7), verse 9 of that passage says, “But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.” Why then do we exalt it exceedingly? Because it is the easier option? And then we unconsciously or consciously propagate this opinion with annoying condescension; like whoever is not in concurrence with the opinion is a lesser being or is damned and doomed for all of eternity.
Some people just have sex; some fall in love, have sex, and then get married and continue having sex; some others fall in love, get married and then begin having sex. I find it unnecessary to state what category I fall under, but what I will say is if you do not know exactly WHY you are under a particular category, your ignorance does not preserve you from whatever ill or provide you with whatever blessing is associated with either category. Understanding is the key. The bible makes it clear that ‘those who worship God worship Him in “truth” and in spirit’, emphasis mine.
The goal of life, or Christian life if you may, is to ‘know’ God, to love God and to worship Him till you are united with Him in Heaven. Mark my words, NO ONE can claim superiority of understanding on this matter, not the Pope, not the Archbishop of Canterbury, not your local pastor, and most certainly not me; hence, I would appreciate if we all just live life the best way we can, get along as much as we can, and hope as much as we want; till the end meets us and our questions will be answered without anyone left in doubt or confusion.
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Iweka Kingsley is a freelance writer and PR/media consultant. He works as a full-time writer with CP-Africa, a platform that celebrates progress across Africa. He is currently working on his second book, a novel titled ‘Reflections of Sunshine’. He blogs atwww.iamscopeman.wordpress.com and tweets from @IwekaKingsley.

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